The Times They Are A-Changing

It wasn't until recently that we have created the norm of a stay-at-home dad. Over the last couple of years, we have found that the mother isn't the one who must be the primary nurturer. "The U.S. Census reports that 32% of married fathers (approximately 7 million dads) are "a regular source of care for their children under age 15, up from 26% from 2002." The U.S. Census defines “regular care of children” as an arrangement that is consistent at least one day per week"(U.S. Census, 2011). From then it's only been growing! 

Personally, I grew up with both parents alternating from being a stay-at-home parent. I honestly have never seen a problem with this, and I think it's quite common. The focus isn't who has to be the one working or who is the one staying home with their child, but it's about your child getting the care and love from both parents. This isn't a hand-off, it's a team effort. 

One thing I know many parents struggle with is deciding whether or not to put their child in daycare. Something to consider is that we shouldn't be making everything we do an exception. Child or not, in our everyday lives we tend to look at job opportunities, friendships, travel, etc., as an excuse not to fulfill some kind of duty we know we should be doing. It's important to put what you believe is more important first. In another class, I took we talked about importance. In a talk, I can't remember by who, they said "It's not that you don't have time to do something, but it's that you don't see it as important." That was something that caught me off guard but now that I think of it, there is so much fact to it! 

I don't believe there is a set parent to stay at home. Something that I will say bothers me quite a bit is when the mother isn't the one staying home and people make comments about it. I don't know about others, but I am the type of person who will be working because of how excited I am about it! I obviously don't know what the future holds but I'm not going to let someone else judge me about working. No matter where you may think you lie in the family, times are a-changing and it's time the world takes a look that women aren't the only ones who will be the stay-at-home parent. 

It may seem like we all have certain roles in a family, but things aren't like that anymore. Someone can try to change my mind, but I can assure you that they won't. Another thing I would like to address is not only parents’ roles, but children's roles as well. As we may all know we consider the oldest to be the leader, middle to be the forgotten, and youngest to be the spoiled. As a middle child I can tell you that it's not exactly true.

For my older brother he seems to take on the family-oriented and religious one of the family. He likes to revolve his stories and outings as being with family and he is also bringing in the gospel whenever he can or felt needed. As for my younger sister she takes on the spokesperson of the family. By this I mean she isn't afraid to say her opinion on things and if you need a bit of reality in you, she is the person to go to. As the middle child I pretend to take the role of the forgotten one, but I actually feel like the tension reliever and the leader. I don't mean for this to sound like I'm the most responsible or anything; however, there are times where I feel like I must lighten the mood during family events or even having to make someone happy. There are other times where I feel like I can't mess up and I must have everything planned and do as well as I can in life. But as for any parent, don't let your child have that pressure of life, or feel less than whatever it is. 

Families require a lot of work but in the end, there is something amazing that comes out of it. No matter your role in your family there shouldn't be anyone who tells you where you should or should not stand in it. We all have different roles and personalities. It's important that you just know what to prioritize and how you decide to raise that family. "Parents can only give [their children] good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands"(Anne Frank).